Dear People Interested In Reading More About The Cosplay Girl Argument (If there are any of you left),

I know that by now if you have an opinion about this topic, or really have just been on the internet recently, you have been inundated with various takes on the subject of cosplay girls and the attention they receive. I too have read many articles, blog posts, and comments and pretty much every side has been covered so I won't bother adding much to the conversation except for two things:

1. The kind of outpouring of negativity that started this most recent chapter of a long running controversy is exactly what I am against on the internet, no matter what the topic.

2. Although it is but one of many, after reading this post and comments specifically, I would like to say that it is not just the people in so called "sexy" costumes that are involved in this. Last year at Comic-Con was the first year I cosplayed. I turned a dress into a TARDIS (which seemed to be a popular choice that year) by painting the dress myself with the appropriate signage, and paneling and making a lamp hat that lit up. I put a lot of work into it and was appreciative when far more people than I thought would be interested wanted to take my picture. Some even told me I was the best TARDIS they had seen, which meant a lot.
     The point of this story is that the dress I chose would in no way fall into the category of sexy. Sure it was strapless, but it being a size too big (the color was why I bought it) and me not being especially well endowed in the chest area, there wasn't much to see. Also it was one of those floor length, fancy, not at all tight-fitting, bridesmaid numbers. And now that I am thinking about it I had caught the Con Plague and had a fever that day so I was looking especially haggard. Despite all of this I was harassed a bit. Most of the people I interacted with were very polite, asked to take my picture, and then went about their business. However, some made crude jokes and said things that I am sure they would not have said to a stranger in another venue. I got a lot of "Are you bigger on the inside?" and "Nice box" type stuff. Sometimes to my face, other times yelled at me from afar as I walked by, but pretty much always involving sexual innuendo.
    At the time I was not too bothered by it (being delirious from sickness may have helped, as I was pretty much focusing my energy on trying not to fall over) and really mostly just sad that that was the best they could come up with. I did in retrospect feel that maybe those are not things you should say to a person you don't know and perhaps this whole "Con Courage" thing is a bit of a problem. Heck, isn't the fact that I basically accepted it when if something similar had happened anywhere else I would have been like "What the F is that dude's problem?!" a solid indicator that there is definitely something going on here?

To sum up: This issue cannot simply be blamed on the girls in sexy or revealing costumes. I was dressed as a non-slutty inanimate object for goodness sake and I was still the recipient of rude sexual comments. Common courtesy is still a thing, right?


Dear Shouting Into The Void,

I really appreciate what you wrote about The Big Bang Theory here. Although I do not necessarily agree with every single thing you say, I do think you make a lot of interesting points (and frankly some which I had never thought about and may change my view of the show a bit, although not enough to stop enjoying it). I especially wanted to thank you for composing a well written and reasonable essay making valid arguments instead of spewing hate with nothing to back it up. The internet needs more people like you.


Dear Nerds,

I am afraid to label myself as a nerd sometimes. Not when talking to people of the non-nerd variety as some might think, but when talking to you. That is right, those of you who were ostracized, picked on, and stereotyped, you are the ones that now have me second guessing myself and feeling bad about it. Congratulations, you have the upper hand.

I like a lot of things the same things you like and with any other group of people who share a similar interest that might be enough. Often though, you make me feel that if I don’t know as many facts about those things as you, or I haven’t liked those things for as long as you, then I just don’t qualify. There is some weird nerd-cred system and I guess sometimes I don’t measure up.

Was I not in chess club in elementary school? Did I not compete (and win) in science/creative fairs? Did I not watch the Star Wars movies over and over again? And yet because I don’t know all the words and minute trivia and didn’t own all the toys, it counts for nothing? (I did know all the words to the musical Cats, but I think that might be something different.) And I am sorry that I only recently discovered Comic-Con and am probably part of the reason some of you think it isn’t like the good old days anymore, but does that mean I shouldn’t be able to dress up like a TARDIS and enjoy it too?

I know that maybe you are just over-protective of the things you love because of jerks. Believe me I understand that you do not want everyone hopping on the nerd bandwagon because it makes it less unique. I was always really into pirates and when the POTC movies came out and suddenly everyone liked pirates I was like “Bah, I liked pirates before they were cool!” but I came to realize that their rise in popularity meant that there was so much more pirate related stuff for me to enjoy. I mean if nerdism had never become more main stream would we have an Avengers movie directed by Joss Whedon? I think not.

Anyway my point is this, for a group that supposedly had it so hard socially you sure can be mean sometimes and being mean is always intimidating no matter who you are. You will probably always know more about all these things than me and so I am totally okay with you continuing to feel superior.  All I ask is that instead of looking down on me for being more “casual” of a nerd than you, maybe you could take my hand and show me the way?

I just want to be myself AND be welcomed. After all isn’t that what most of us want? I know labels are kind of unnecessary, but I want to stop saying I and You and start saying We. Am I overthinking it? Probably and feel free to tell me if all this sentiment is stupid (as I am sure you will). However, I cannot be the only one who feels this way sometimes and I just thought it should be out there.

And if you just read this whole thing and thought “That isn’t what I am like at all!” which really is probably most of you, then thank you. I appreciate you for that and please pass this along to any snobby, angry, nerd friends (you probably know who they are) you might have.

Sincerely and with love,

Dear Madam,

Yes, reading is educational and beneficial and fun. Yes, I too would like to utilize as many opportunities to read as possible. However, is it really worth it to read when you are stopped at a stoplight in the car next to me? I mean you might get in what, like a page? Maybe two if you are skimming? And if in fact it is worth it, you should at least probably put the book away once you start moving forward next time.

I fully promote reading and patronizing your nearest public library, but the library cannot be help responsible if you get in a car accident because you were reading a borrowed book while driving.

Just so you know.


Dear Comic-Con,

THANK YOU for having a second chance sale for those who registered, but got jacked by the link failure when passes went up. I am reluctant to use the word "devastated," but not getting passes the first time was sad. Luckily the second time worked out, four days with preview night here we come! (I am sure it was pure luck that I managed to get passes the second time around and there were still people who got jacked, and to those people: you have my sympathy. However, I am now happy.)

Thank you!